I thought I was sooo prepared...I really did! After all, Sam has been ready to be on his own for quite some time and I could see it coming fast. I was even thinking about all the positive benefits of being an empty nester... like my house would stay clean, my cupboards would stay full, grocery shopping would be cheaper, dinnertime would be so much easier...no more guessing how many I would be serving, what time they would be here (always staggered so I would need to keep food warm), likes and dislikes, etc. I would gain a much needed office/hobby room (already patching walls and choosing paint colors). There were days that I couldn't hear myself think for all the noise and chaos. Oh yeah, being an empty nester was gonna be sooo sweet. That was last week; I'm singing a different tune this week!
We spent Friday and Saturday moving Sam into his new apartment. He was so happy that I couldn't help but get caught up in the excitement as well. It wasn't until Monday morning that the reality set in and I realized my nest was empty, my job was done, my life had changed and I was now in a new season. I was stunned with how hard this realization hit me. I was not at all prepared for the quiet stillness of the house. The whole atmosphere has changed. I still listen for Sam's truck to come rolling into the driveway. I find myself looking out the kitchen window to see if Amy will show up for dinner and a good game of Wii. I have trouble passing the empty bedroom without getting a little teary and I miss spending a few minutes with Sam in the mornings before he's off to work.
Many people have told me that this is the time to reconnect with my husband and work on our relationship. That seems like great advice, but I am happy to report that we can't reconnect because we never disconnected in the first place. We can, however, have great conversations without fear of being overheard or disturbed by kids coming and going and that's nice!
Maybe because I have been a full time stay at home mom and homemaker for the last quarter of a century, it will be a little harder for me to adjust, but that's ok because I wouldn't trade the years of raising my boys for anything. The sacrifices were many, but the rewards have been immeasurable.
It's so ironic that we raise our kids to be independent and make their own way in the world and then when they actually do we're left feeling sad and a little lost. I know these feelings will fade and I will move on to new things and experiences. I will learn to enjoy the peace and quiet and the freedom that comes from no kids in the house....and that's probably when I'll get a grandbaby to disrupt everything again...at least I hope so!!
10 comments:
What a beautiful post mom. You got me tearing up over here!
I can't thank you enough for all the hardwork and sacrifices that you and Steve made to raise such wonderful men who love God and love their wives. I prayed so hard that God would have a mate out there that was raised up in the same manner you raised Kyle. I am blessed beyond belief to have such a wonderful, loving husband and new family that I love so dearly!
I am praying for you. *HUGS*
I think you were exactly right about gettig comfortable with your empty nest just in time for there to be a grandbaby. Love always!
Awww, thank you Holly! Your comment made my day. We love you dearly too and are so glad you are part of our family. My nest may be empty, but my heart is full! Thank you for praying; I am truly blessed.
I will be forever grateful for all you guys did for us and all the sacrifices. I can only hope your awesome example rubbed off enough on me so I can be a great parent too!
I know I'm grateful that, even though Holly and I are starting our own lives together, we are still close to you both and Sam and Amy too. We have all been very blessed indeed!
Love,
Kyle
Thank you Kyle; your comment means so much to me. I am so glad we are all close too. I already know you will be an awesome dad someday! Yes, we are indeed blessed!
Wow Sandy, what a post! You had me crying, then the comments made me cry again. I love and admire all of you so much! We are so lucky to have you all in our lives. (((HUGS)))
Dee,
Thank you for the nice comment... we're blessed to have you too! Love you guys! (((hugs)))
Ok, it's Dads turn to chime in.
Things sure are different around here. In the past 13 months, our kiddos went from 2 to 4. We gained wonderful girls for our boys. We love them all.
I knew that this part of our lives was coming, but I didn't realize how hard it was going to be. It is hard to get up in the morning and go by 2 empty bedrooms. Or not leaving the garage light on for them for when they came home at night.
I thank God for all He has done for us. It has made us an example for our kids and they have paid attention. They have grown up to be great kids and they are now being great men. They grow up so fast and they are managing their lives so good. They met their wife and so to be wife. They will also make great parents. So the cycle continues.
The sound of quietness, for now, will turn into sounds of pitter/patter of little feet when the grandkids show up. Their parents will enjoy some special time as will us.
Our lives are just entering into another chapter, not the end of the book.
Kyle and Holly, Sam and Amy -- enjoy your new lives together and we are soooooo blessed to have all 4 of you so close that we could get together anyday/anytime.
So Sandy, with this little sadness will come great joy. I Love You soooooo much. We will get through this together.
Great comment Honey! I already feel like we're beginning to transition in a positive manner! It helps so much that the kids pop in and out too! I love you! Happy Valentine's Day Baby!
Written straight from the heart! Thanks for sharing but how do I explain my tears at work?!
By the way, now that you have those empty bedrooms, isn't it a great opportunity to turn them into snake rooms?
Hi Jim,
I thought about your suggestion to raise snakes, but then I remembered my policy: NO SNAKES ALLOWED IN THE HOUSE!!! If the snakes move in, I'll be forced to move out!! :)
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